Victoria's new secret

My first thought when I heard Al Qaeda has a new "more sophisticated" underwear bomb: What,they shop Victoria's Secret, now? Then I realized a Victoria's Secret bra and panties set would hold hardly enough explosives to light a cigarette. Forget bringing down an airliner.

So maybe it was Fruit of the Loom? A little better, but look at those guys in the ads - but let's face it, that giant apple and all those grapes are not going to make it through airport security ("No food, sir") much less fit their hats in the overhead compartment. And the major issue would be what to do with all the fruit salad afterwards.

Maybe a union suit. (Young people: one-piece underwear, usually red, back door flap)A little better, but if you have ever worn one (yes, I have. long story for another post) you know union suits are in no way considered "sophisticated." Complicated, yes; sophisticated, no.

That leaves, what? Boxers or briefs, I suppose. Perhaps it was this long-standing conundrum that allowed National Security ample time ferret out the plot.

Balance in the Universe

Crossing the street on my walk (from my car)to work this morning I noticed yet another balance in the universe: For every nice First Driver willing to slow down at the crosswalk and let you cross two of the four lanes on Wells Avenue, there is an equal and opposite drive in the other lane speeding up to cross the intersection. I feel like an idiot standing there not responding to first guys generosity because of clueless Second Drive who will RUN ME OVER!
Here's a suggestion: if you are nice enough to let me cross, make sure no one is speeding by in the next lane. We will balance the universe with me waving in acknowledgement of your kindness and you can know you've still done the nice polite small-southern-town gesture.